What to do when you are being Abused Physically, Emotionally or Psychologically?

Domestic violence for avoidance of doubt includes battery, beatings, torture, starvation, economic abuse & exploitation, stalking, denial of basic education, acid bath, rape and consequently death. This typically inflicted by parents on child, siblings, domestic staff etc.

Intimate partner violence on the other hand is same torture but between lovers, either married, live-in or simply dating.

Here are a few shocking truths to note

1. The statistics in Nigeria is one in every three women suffer from domestic violence.  You are not alone and it is not peculiar to just you.
2. In 2021, The Lagos state domestic and sexual violence response team (DSVRT) dealt with 2,584 domestic violence reported cases. (We are pretty sure that the unreported cases outnumber the reported ones).
3. Every domestic violence case is a potential murder case (Every time you get hit, your partner is guilty of attempted murder).
4. Anyone with interest can bring a complaint on behalf of the victim and this includes teachers, social workers, Nigerian police force, organization, health service provider, counsellor. (People can report on your behalf)
5. The Law protects not only marriages but also cohabiting relationships (so you can get protection from a boyfriend, girlfriend etc)
6. Emotional Abuse is a CRIME and it is punishable with imprisonment or fine.
7. Emotional Abuse includes constant criticisms, accusations & blames, verbal & psychological abuse. (If there is a pattern of degrading or humiliating conduct including repeated insults, ridicule or name calling, repeated threats to cause emotional pain, then you are being emotionally abused).
8. A person’s mental health comes into question when the only way he resolves conflict is through violence and aggression. (You may be living with a mad man or woman literarily)
9. Children who grow up in homes where the parents practice intimate partner violence will most likely grow up to perpetuate abuse. (you can turn your children in to monsters by doing nothing about the violence in your home)
10. The Lagos state government has set up a specific agency that protects domestic violence victims. They are called the Lagos state Domestic Sexual and Violence Response Team
11. You can get a restraining order under the law against an abuser or stalker.
12. If you are in Lagos and you need help visit www.dsvrtlagos.org or call 08137960048
13. If you are in Anambra, Bauchi, Ekiti, Enugu, Kaduna and Oyo, send email to info@naptip.gov.ng or call 080255627847
14. If in any other state, pls contact the police force, the Nigerian Police have specific desks that will deal with issues of domestic and sexual violence.